I have seen so much forum goodness and helpfulness lately that I have decided to share my expert knowledge on being a terribad.
So lo and behold, peasants, here are King aquabad’s tip for WoWP terribadness:
General Tip:
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Never, ever, in your life, look at the forums for tips or advices. And I don’t mean asking for it, for we all know this is a snakepit. DO. NOT. EVEN. READ. IT.
I can tell you a couple of stories of forum badness. Once I was a great GA player, and I’ll tell you about GAing later, but like every GA player I went about my ways just shooting one rocket at each AA gun on a mine and guess what?! Suddenly I read here some terrible advice (probably from an IL20 driver such as myself) that perhaps I should use my rockets to kill the biggest target there and then use them bombs to kill another two armored targets… Bad advice, because it made my loss rate much lower.
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Never search for the best way to play a plane. You know how some people think some planes should not try to turn fight, or some planes should try to keep a low altitude and defend a sector? Lies, all of it. Nevermind it all. Those people are not just good enough with those planes. Have a zero? Just chase that BF109Z all the way into the sky and everything will work out. True story.
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Nevermind unfriendly tips from those reds who just beat you. Did you just try to outturn the guy in the A6M5 in a P40 5 times in a row and it didn’t work out a single time? Well, hax and cheats it was. If he tries to give you a tip afterwards, he’s just trying to improve his hackiness and cheatiness. Don’t listen to the guy and keep doing it over and over again. Maybe the 1000th time is the charm.
Turny fighter tippy tip:
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The first thing you got to know about those turny things, like the zero, is they excel at two things: flying very high and attacking heavily defended ground targets. The true story is you thrive in AA and trying to kill those bombers.
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Just keep on turning, and nevermind your environment or the minimap. Got twelve reds all around you? Focus on just one and just try to shoot that sumabitch down. That’ll work.
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See that GA in that mine trying to capture it? The best way to help it is by trying to shoot the heaviest armoured target around and dying in the process. Not like it will hinder it a all. And if that stupid bastard doesn’t capture the sector because the counter reset? Well, he’s just hindering you. Continue doing what you were doing.
Bomy and zoomy tip:
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So you’re flying the invincible and oh so mighty boomy and zoomy plane. Want to know a smart way to play it? See that very turny zero there? Just stick to his [edited]. If he tries to turn and succeeds? Just cut your throttle and try to turn with him. There is no better way to do it. Every. Time. Didn’t get him? It was either hax or gold rounds, obviously.
Finally, never let anyone tell you otherwise. The only reason you don’t win more, is because of haxes, game hates you, or whatever. Feel free to add more tips if you have them.
Yours faithfully,
King aquabad,
High lord of the terribads